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Mystery Solved

Started by Steve Rogers, August 05, 2018, 07:13:37 AM

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Steve Rogers

I noticed this on my recent drive through Mt Vernon, IL on the way back from Oshkosh. Here you go Paul:

The Mass killing of crows on Route 15 west of Davidson Avenue, near RP Lumber mystery has been solved.

The Mt Vernon Police Department was called out to Route 15 West about dead crows covering the highway. When the Mt Vernon Police arrived they found a total of 532 crows covering the highway. Most of the birds showed no signs of why they died.
There was speculation they may have died because of chemicals used on nearby crops, or roadside spraying by Shilo Township.

IDNR was contacted and the lab tech from the office came out and confirmed it was not because of their spraying.

Under the leadership of an agent from the IDNR an investigation was launched. The agent brought in a K9 dog 'Sniffer'. They could not find any chemical residue. However found several hundred pounds of spilled corn, which may have come from the grain truck that was reported to have had its tailgate pop open.

This report of a truck losing grain was about an hour earlier. The only description given was a white 1980s Chevy grain truck. The driver was wearing a green shirt and red hat. The driver looked to be in his late 60s early 70s.

With the help of Jefferson County Deputy Sheriff, the Sheriff's office transported 20 of the birds to the State Lab in Springfield.
The lab reportedly found small traces of paint and blunt force trauma on the birds. Testing of the paint came back as paint used in automotive paint. The tests were sent to a paint lab of a leading paint company located in Chicago, Illinois. Their tests revealed it was paint used on motorcycles.

With the help of a state Crow Expert with the Illinois extension office in Edwardsville Illinois, Dr Allan Smith we have been able to solve the mystery.

It has been determined that the crows were killed by a large biker group that passed through the area on their motorcycles.

The Crow expert explained when crows land to feed, for every bird that is eating (corn in this case). Another bird keeps watch for dangers. It turns out the crows were hit because the crows can only say CAR CAR and not Bike Bike.
Signed: Steve Rogers (As far as you know)
Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
For Herb: All facts have not been personally verified by me for accuracy. Use them at your own risk.

Paul Lange

Very unfortunate....we must do something about this.  I have started to write to those in high places and demand we ban corn, paint, commerical pick up truck tailgates and all bikes must now purchase front side and rear plates with lettering 1ft high and three feet long that spell CAH.

I am quite sure the local communist organizers will see to this in order to save the Crow Nation

-Paul H Lange
Best Regards - Paul H Lange

Lane C.

I thought the ending was going to be they ate so much they exceeded their gross weight factor for a hot day/high density altitude, short-field takeoff attempt!
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